Santa Shot Down!!

On Christmas Eve, as Santa Claus was delivering gifts to children around the world, apparently the unthinkable happened. 

Santa was making his way across the globe when a military fighter was scrambled to check out an unknown "bogey".  He quickly calculated a course ahead of the astonishingly fast sleigh, knowing that even with afterburners lit, he would not be able to keep up.

Unfortunately, as he turned to face the sleigh, Rudolph wasn't sure what was ahead of him and lit his nose extra bright.  That caused the fighter pilot to be temporarily blinded and accidentally fired two missiles.  Even though the missiles hit their target, the rate of closure did not allow the fighter pilot to avoid the sleigh and a mid-air collision occurred.  The fighter pilot was able to eject and escaped with minor injuries, although he is reportedly 2 inches shorter.

In typical military fashion, blame was quickly placed on the North Pole...

"We acted prudently with self-defense measures to ensure the unknown target would not penetrate prohibited military airspace.  Santa Claus' inappropriate flying techniques and failure to avoid prohibited airspace caused this unfortunate accident to occur.  Fault rests squarely on the North Pole." - A military spokesman.

The North Pole defended itself...

"Santa’s sleigh is clearly marked as civilian aircraft with appropriate lighting, flying well within international airspace." - Head elf.

As for Santa, his sleigh, and his reindeer, the location was so remote that rescue crews have been unable to reach it at this time.  However, it was reported that Santa was struck by a passing airliner as he was using his sack as a parachute.

At this time, the US Congress is meeting in an emergency session to decide if retaliation is due for "taking out" Santa.

The NTSB has been dispatched to assist in the investigation since the airliner was involved.  While the NTSB refuses to speculate on the actual cause of the accident, they did note that Santa Claus' has had repeated warnings that Rudolph's nose does not meet criteria for aircraft lighting, stating it needs to be flashing and lesser intensity to meet guidelines.

"While the primary cause remains to be determined, we cannot rule out that Rudolph's nose played a contributing factor in the cause of the accident".  - NTSB investigator.

What will become of the North Pole operations and Christmas gift deliveries.  Nothing is for sure yet, but rumors that the North Pole will file for Chapter 11 protection and suspend operations are already hitting the airwaves.